Ten Things You Probably Don’t Know About Me


ImageThe other day I was finally catching up on my blog readings and I came across NDP’s post, “Ten things you may not know about me…”  It is a great piece.  Oftentimes, writers, bloggers, and artists create these blogs, but as they become more successful and larger than their original roots a new persona is created.  Readers begin to lose sight of the blogger and the blogger loses sight of his or her readers.

A simple post titled, “Ten Things You Probably Don’t Know About Me,” brings it back though.  It closes the gap between the writer and the reader.  I find this to be important.  I write for those to read, and I read to engage those that write.  I should never expect any less of myself.

Check NDP’s blog, “NDPworld.”  It’s a regularly updated and fantastic blog featuring the thoughts and poetics of NDP.  He is acutely aware of social and cultural beats and it is shown within his poetry.  I always gain a new perspective when reading his work.  I urge you to check it out.

Here is my blatant ripoff, “Ten Things You Probably Don’t Know About Me”:

  • I’ve worked as a grocer for the past six-years in various departments and positions.  A jack-of-all-trades if you will.  I enjoy it because it provides health insurance and stories.
  • My favorite band is the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and my favorite album of theirs is “By The Way”; however, my favorite track is “Under the Bridge” from their “Blood. Sugar. Sex. Magik” LP.  *As an aside: vinyl is the only way to go.
  • I enjoy longboarding a great deal.  One of my closest friends and I are building our own longboards, and are considering starting a ‘Spokane Longboarding Group’ for amateurs.  We’re working on several Spokane longboarding guides.
  • I am an atheist.  I appreciate theological and religious scripture from a historical and literary standpoint, but I have difficulties believing in a God.  However, that being said I rarely ever bring it up and it doesn’t bother me to hear of other people’s faith as long as they aren’t trying to indoctrinate me.
  • I have an obese ten-year-old Black and Tan Dachshund named Norman.  I’ve had him for over five-years now and he is the first dog I’ve ever really owned.  He is my best friend, and I don’t know what I would do without him.
  • I am a coffee addict.  It seems cliche, especially coming from a Washingtonian, but I enjoy coffee immensely.  My French Press is my friend.  Luckily for me I work right next to a Starbucks.
  • My best friend and I are currently writing a television screenplay called, “Baggage,” that is about the dark humor found when working in a retail industry, the macabre found in higher education without a job, and crazy girlfriends and boyfriends.
  • I grew up in and around Spokane, WA, USA.  I ended graduating from high school in Cheney Washington and tried to finish a bachelor’s degree at Eastern Washington University, but inevitably found writing to be my calling, rather than academia.
  • I have an immense love of comic books.  I find them to be an ‘American Mythology’ of sorts.  I started my writing career writing reviews about comics books and I still trek down to Merlyn’s Sci-fi and Fantasy Shop every week and pick up my haul.  Funnily enough, my fiancée also enjoys them a great deal and it is a hobby that we started together when we first started dating.
  • I’ve often been described as eccentric.  I try to be a student of all. I love all-types of philosophy, literature, film, and games.  I can be fairly moody, and I think that this plays into my interests.  It has to match my mood, but at the end of the day I will try anything once just to say I have.

 

Morning Wood


Get your mind of the gutter you pervs…jeez…what kind of a reader base do I have…oh wait zilch!  Scratch the humor…as I sit upon the floor of my apartment enjoying a hot tasty beverage spiked with some Irishy goodness, and yes Irishy is the proper conjugation for the context in which I used the pronoun Irish.  You disagree?  Take it up with my lawyer.  He lives with his mom down on 3rd by the halfway houses…if you can survive it there to his ‘home’ at 11pm in downtown Spokane on any given night…you win! 

This morning as I stumbled out of my bedroom after my girlfriend had headed off to work I realized with a sudden spark of pain, with my Albert Einstein fro and Scooby Doo totin’ self rammed my cranium into the hallway closet door, that the small things in life are where it matters. 

For instance chilling and watchin’ a bitchin’ movie with your loved one…equals epic.  Sitting by yourself in the closet of solitude next to the urine producing gorilla and the spot in which a self-taught war ferret should reside is NOT so epic.  If this latter instance has occurred in your recent past I might recommend sitting down and re-evaluating some past dicisions…preferably without the presence of the ferret or the gorilla.

Also, how often do you get to just do what you want to do?  So many individuals do this or that without of the slightest acknowledgement that it is the complete and utter opposite of what they truly want to do!  They’re almost coerced into it by the ‘man’…societal preasures that tell them that they have to go to school to succeed, that they have to work at a job that they hate, that they have to stay with someone they don’t love…this is utter bullshit.

You don’t owe anyone anything.  Do what you want to do.  I’m a bastard, and I know that if I go to let say a gala event that I did not want to attend, but did because of a loved one…I’m going to be a prick to just about everyone there, because odds are I’d rather by playing the Final Fantasy II bass line elsewhere.  This is not to say that you shouldn’t spend time with your family, friends, and/or spouse, but rather you should WANT to, and not be FORCED to.

Anyways, my ramblings have taken a more serious turn, but in the end I follow this philosophy and as most of my closest confidantes can attest to I follow it pretty religiously…do what you want to do…when you want to do it.  You’re an adult…you have one life to live, and live it like it’s your last because for all we know..it is!

Anthony ‘Mc-Fuckin’ Schultz

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